Not Everyone Will Make It. But Anyone Can

A conversation about confidence, setbacks and the long game of player development

Most young cricketers will experience setbacks.

They will lose form. They will miss out on selection. They will have games where they feel out of their depth. They will doubt themselves, question their ability, and wonder whether they are falling behind.

That is not unusual. In fact, it is part of the game.

The more important question is not whether those setbacks happen. It is how a player responds when they do.

In Episode 16 of the Cricket Mind Podcast, Nathan Wood was joined by Faisal Shahid, Academy Manager at Warwickshire Women, former Worcestershire pathway player, England Under-17 representative, MCC Young Cricketer and professional cricketer.

Faisal has worked across almost every stage of the player development journey, from under-10s through to senior and professional cricket. What came through strongly in the conversation was not just his coaching experience, but his understanding of the emotional reality of trying to make it in cricket.

This was a thoughtful, honest discussion about confidence, resilience, motivation, identity, parents, coaching, and why long-term development is rarely as simple as “who looks good early”.

Long-term development means keep getting better

One of Faisal’s clearest messages was that long-term development is not about being the best player at 13, 14 or 15.

It is about the ability to keep improving.

A player who dominates at under-13 level is not guaranteed to keep progressing. Equally, a player who is not the standout at 14 may still develop into someone much stronger later on.

This is an important message for players, parents and coaches because youth cricket can easily become consumed by early labels.

“He’s the best batter.”

“She’s a county player.”

“He didn’t make the EPP.”

“She’s fallen behind.”

The danger is that these labels start to feel permanent. But development is rarely linear. Players grow physically, emotionally, tactically and psychologically at different rates.

Faisal described long-term development as the discipline to keep doing the things that help you get better. Not once. Not when things are going well. But consistently, especially when progress feels slow.

That is where genuine development happens.

Confidence is not about never having a bad day

Confidence is often misunderstood in cricket.

Many players think confidence means feeling good, scoring runs, taking wickets, being selected, or receiving praise. But if confidence is built only on good outcomes, it becomes fragile.

As Faisal put it, confidence is not just about performing well. It is about being able to survive a bad day.

That is a powerful idea.

The genuinely confident player is not the one who never struggles. It is the player who can have a poor game without falling apart. The player who can get a duck without deciding they are useless. The player who can be left out of a team without assuming their journey is over.

That does not mean setbacks do not hurt. They do.

But confident players learn to separate the performance from the person. They can say, “I had a bad day,” without turning it into, “I am not good enough.”

That distinction matters enormously.

When outcomes become identity, cricket becomes heavy

One of the biggest themes in the episode was identity.

Young cricketers can easily begin to define themselves by their cricket. They become “the batter”, “the bowler”, “the county player”, “the academy kid”, or “the one who always scores runs”.

At first, those labels can feel positive. They bring attention, praise and status.

But they also create pressure.

If a player’s identity is built around performance, every innings becomes a judgement on who they are. Every selection decision feels personal. Every failure feels like evidence.

That is a heavy way to play.

Faisal spoke openly about his own playing career and how, when he was released from professional cricket, he viewed that setback as evidence that he was not good enough. It took him a long time to reinterpret that experience and understand it differently.

That honesty is valuable because many young players do the same thing in quieter ways.

They get dropped and think, “They don’t rate me.”

They have a bad season and think, “Maybe I’m not that good.”

They fall behind physically and think, “I’ll never catch up.”

The job of coaches and parents is not to remove disappointment. That is impossible. The job is to help players interpret disappointment in a way that keeps them moving.

The right conversation can change the whole picture

One of the most striking stories Faisal shared was about a talented young player who was struggling badly against the short ball.

For weeks, Faisal tried different drills, coaching methods and technical interventions. Nothing seemed to shift the problem.

Eventually, he stopped the session and simply spoke to the player. He admitted he was out of ideas and asked what was really going on.

The player then explained that he had been hit in the jaw by a cricket ball when he was younger, and that the fear had stayed with him.

That changed everything.

The issue was not simply technical. It was emotional. It had history attached to it.

This is a powerful reminder for coaches. Before rushing to intervention, seek understanding.

Poor performance always has a context. Sometimes it is technical. Sometimes tactical. Sometimes physical. Sometimes psychological. Often, it is a mixture.

If we only coach what we can see, we may miss what the player is actually carrying.

Parents shape the inner voice

Faisal was very clear that parents play a huge role in a young player’s confidence.

Not because they need to become coaches. In many cases, the opposite is true.

Parents matter because they become part of the player’s inner voice.

The comments before a match. The body language on the boundary. The car journey home. The reaction to failure. The questions after selection. The way success is rewarded and disappointment is handled.

All of it leaves a mark.

One of the strongest practical messages from the episode was that parents should avoid linking love, warmth or attention to performance outcomes.

If a child scores runs and gets ice cream, but gets out cheaply and goes home in silence, the message is clear — even if unintended.

Performance has become the condition.

Instead, Faisal encouraged parents to reward commitment, effort and intent. If you want your child to play bravely, your language must support bravery. If you want them to express themselves, your reaction to mistakes must allow expression.

Players cannot play freely if they fear the response afterwards.

Motivation needs stamina

Many young cricketers lose their love for the game because cricket becomes almost entirely outcome-based.

Selection. Batting order. Bowling opportunities. Play-Cricket stats. Squad announcements. Social media. Comparison.

It can quickly become exhausting.

Faisal described the need for “stamina of motivation”. That phrase captures something important. Motivation is not just excitement at the start of a season. It is the ability to stay connected to the process when things become repetitive, difficult or disappointing.

The best players often have ambition, but they are not only driven by the distant dream.

They learn to enjoy the work.

They understand what their next step is. They know what they are trying to improve. They commit to the process, rather than constantly judging themselves by the latest scorecard.

That does not mean outcomes do not matter. Of course they do.

But outcomes are often the by-product of better habits, clearer thinking and more purposeful training.

“Not everyone will make it. But anyone can make it.”

Perhaps the strongest line from the episode was Faisal’s challenge to a common phrase in youth cricket.

We often hear: “Not everyone is going to make it.”

That may be true. But said carelessly, it can also become an excuse. It can lower ambition, protect people from disappointment, or create a quiet sense that the pathway is already decided.

Faisal’s version was much better:

Not everyone will make it. But anyone can make it.

That is the balance.

It is honest without being limiting. It accepts that the journey is difficult, while still leaving room for growth, late development and possibility.

No coach truly knows which 13-year-old will become a professional cricketer. No parent knows exactly when their child will mature. No player knows how far they can go if they keep learning, adapting and improving.

The point is not to promise outcomes.

The point is to keep possibility alive.

Boys cricket, girls cricket and the value of joy

Faisal has coached extensively across both boys’ and girls’ cricket, and one of his reflections was that coaching in the women’s and girls’ game has made him a better coach.

He spoke about the need to be more intentional with language, more thoughtful in session design, and more aware of the emotional climate within a group.

He also made an interesting distinction: boys often compete more individually, while girls often compete more collectively. That does not mean one environment is better than the other, but it does mean coaches need to understand what brings the best out of different players and groups.

One of Faisal’s strongest observations was that boys cricket could learn from the joy, togetherness and freedom he has seen in girls cricket.

That feels important.

High performance should not mean joyless performance. Academy cricket should not feel like a two-year examination. Pathway cricket should not remove the very thing that made players love the game in the first place.

Yes, the work matters. Standards matter. Challenge matters.

But so does enjoyment.

The player is more than the performance

This episode was full of practical insight, but the underlying message was simple.

Young cricketers need to be helped to see themselves clearly, not harshly.

They need adults who challenge them without crushing them. Parents who support them without rescuing them. Coaches who understand them before trying to fix them. Environments that value growth, humility, effort, courage and self-awareness — not just the scorecard.

Cricket is a difficult game. It exposes players. It gives them long waits, public failures and endless comparison.

But it can also teach them something deeply valuable.

How to respond.

How to keep going.

How to separate who they are from what just happened.

And how to believe that, even if not everyone will make it, anyone can.